Constantly talking is not necessarily communicating.
_{- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind}
Why do I fall in love with every woman I see that shows me the least bit of attention?
_{- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind}
Nick: I don't put alcohol into my body.
Rodger: Drink up, liquor has been a social lubricant for a thousand years, but you, you're going to reinvent the wheel?!
_{-Rodger Dodger}
Van: It's a date.
Gwen: It's an interview.
Van: Gwen.. first dates are interviews
_{- Van Wilder}
I know Ms. Pac-Man is special. She's fun. She's cute. She swallows.
_{- Van Wilder}
You shouldn't take life to seriously. You'll never get out alive.
_{- Van Wilder}
Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere.
_{- Van Wilder}
If you're always thinking about the future, then you kinda forget about the present.
_{- Van Wilder}
Well, I still jerk off manually.
_{- The Big Lebowski}
Maude Lebowski: Do you like sex, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: 'Scuse me?
Maude Lebowski: Sex. The physical act of love. Coitus. Do you like it?
The Dude: I was talking about my rug.
Maude Lebowski: You're not interested in sex?
The Dude: You mean coitus?
_{- The Big Lebowski}
This could be a lot more uh, uh, uh, complex, I mean it just might, it might not be such a simple, uh, you know?
_{- The Big Lebowski}
The Big Lebowski: You don't go out looking for a job dressed like that? On a weekday?
The Dude: Is this a... what day is this?
_{- The Big Lebowski}
Trent: Baby, that was money! Tell me that wasn't money.
Mike: That was so demeaning.
Trent: She smiled, baby.
Mike: I can't believe what an asshole you are.
Trent: No. No, baby, she smiled.
Mike: She smiled about what an asshole you are.
_{- Swingers}
Hey! What're you kicking me for? You want me to ask? All right, I'll ask! Ma'am, where do the high school girls hang out in this town?
_{- Swingers}
Mike: So how long do I wait to call?
Trent: A day.
Mike: So tomorrow.
Sue: No. Tomorrow, then a day.
Trent: Yeah.
Mike: So two days.
Trent: ...yeah, I guess you could call it that.. two days...
_{- Swingers}
Trent: You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now it's like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is kind of money. What do you think?
Sue: Yeah, but two's enough not to look anxious.
Trent: But I think three days is kind of money. You know because you...
Mike: Yeah, but you know what, maybe I'll wait 3 weeks. How's that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just happened to run into her number..
Charles: Then ask her where you met her.
Mike: Yeah, I'll ask her where I met her. I don't remember. What does she look like? And then I'll asked if we fucked. Is that... would that be... T, would that be the money?
Trent: You know what. "Ha Ha Ha" Mike, laugh all you want but if you call too soon you might scare off a nice baby who's ready to party.
Mike: Well how long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?
Trent, Sue: Six days.
_{- Swingers}
And it's like I'm supposed to be all happy 'cause she's wearing a backpack?
_{- Swingers}
You take yourself out of the game... you start talking about puppy dogs and ice cream and of course it's going to end up on the friendship tip.
_{- Swingers}
God, my brilliance is now becoming a bit of a burden. Get back to me.
_{- Scrubs}
Drug dealers don't sell drugs! Drugs, sell themselves! I never heard a drug dealer go 'Maaan! How I'm gon' get rid of all this crack?!'
_{- Chris Rock}
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy,
the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese,
the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of
arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most
powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.
Need I say more?
_{- Chris Rock}